MatchesOnFire: Welcome to the Ivory Tower-
Kanye: Yo Matches, I'ma gonna let yo finish but Kim Jong-il has the best chat room of ALL TIME.
Owner and Rules Edit
Club goin up!
On a tuesday;
Got your girl in the cut, and she choosey! 16
The current owner of Ivory Tower is no one. The former owner of Ivory Tower was Rogerette.
Rogerette says: "There are three Rules of Ivory Tower.
1. Don't be an idiot. 2. We are not "Kongredate". No mush. 3. Don't be an idiot.
If you need rules 1 or 3 explained, chances are you won't like it here, but feel free to ask."
going2killu says: "There are three rules that promote survival.
1. Seriously. Don't be an idiot. Seriously. 2. Crack is whack. 3. Don't call respected regs trolls (refer to rule 1)."
Marb says: "There are 3 Reg Rules of Ivory Tower as well.
1. Don't try to be cool, cause you'll try too hard and fail. 2. If you don't get something and no one explains, drop it. 3. If you aren't in a conversation and you enter and don't get it, don't try to."
Rogerette Rogerette is the main and most active moderator, and was room Owner. She doesn't talk constantly, but she is on and watching when she can, and the Ivory Tower loves her. =]
Crysanna She is a Runescape addict and moderates the game chat on there. She is more active on Runescape than in life.
charity236 Dubbed the room sweetheart by Thor and Jake, Charity tries to be nice to everyone. Can take a while to get her talking, but once she starts... Also likes shooting zombies with the guys.
Very Active Edit
intreker05 This police recruit will beat you both ways to Sunday before you get an insult in edgeways, but Intreker's really quite tame if you can string two brain cells together in your conversation... (the most manly woman eva.)
Kool16 Read the name. That's all there is to it.
Meatshield He's married... and... he gets action 24/7. Totally random and funny =] EXPECT CAPS LOCK!
Morgan133 A shit speller, a "freemanmason", and a harnesser of the power of sensibility, Morgan is a whiz with time zones and will take the Troll Slam-Dunk (especially when set up by Thor).
Mint_ She is a regular with somewhat of a temper, but controls it well. She started on a less gender neutral account (No name mentioned) and changed it to a more gender neutral name so there wouldn't be 12 year old stalkers all the time XD. *facedesk*! (responds to "angry chinchilla") Nicknamed "MintTheBabyEater" by EpicwarKING.
opiatejake The King of the Ivory Tower. He doesn't take crap from no one, but is still funny and cool. He makes jokes often when he isn't idle. Also good buds with Kool, Meat & Thor. (together they do bad things 0.o)
thor0486 Pals with Jake and a real troll stomper, Thor's razor wit and sarcastic remarks cause trolls to fear him and certain lazy Moderators to love him. Arrives to commiserate with the summons, "So, Metallica's sold out..." Also enjoys Cake The cake is a lie, the band. But when it comes to political debates (health care plan ftw!) and owning trolls there's no better.
Mildly Active Edit
ajfriss A frequenter of the chat, ajfriss enjoys being sadistic, and is the room's resident insane person. Often late at night starts talking very sophisticatedly. Nicknamed Afro for unknown reasons. Also is going to die of lung cancer.
BlackBone Always BB, never 'Bone' or 'Black' (because those are both completely retarded nicknames), BlackBone is an amiable and helpful member of the tower, his prowess allowing him to defeat any game with the piece of mind to help out any who ask. He is also not the new king of Ivory Tower despite what he might say.
epicwarKING EpicwarKING (EWK for short) is an individual that will pop in out of freaking nowhere and will not shut up! (Haha, I'm kidding dude!) But he's actually pretty cool and has multiple babes =] Quite a lot of multiple babes... ^^
going2killu Long-time regular. Definitely worth meeting... He's on often but he doesn't chat much (I go through stretches of chat inactivity, and stretches of conversation domination. That's just how it works).
Marbaba When she's in a bad mood she's relatively calm. That can be an advantage... or it can bring boredom to the tower. Warning: She bites, pounces and tackles. She also goes all Tae Kwon Do and smartass on some people. Don't get on her bad side. Often mistaken for a guy. Likes smilies. xD
MichaelMoo I'm a pretty laid back guy. I do come off as being antagonistic but that's only because I use sarcasm to its greatest form, if you don't get it, it's either because you don't know me and don't get my true feelings on the subject or are just really stupid. If you don't understand what I'm getting at, just ask me. I also have a bad temper when it comes to certain subjects such as homophobism, racism, and other types of ignorance as it really bothers me.
mckillyoface Insane to the point of him thinking he's the Black Mage. Commonly insults trolls and anyone not showing an average amount of intelligence, going on and on about it. Generally amiable. Never shuts up.
queen9223 isn't lame enough to write about herself -.-
Sapphiremind Sapph can be identified with sarcasm and immaculate spelling. Refers to herself as "Room Mom" since she's older and has kids of her own.
Phoenix24688642: Going by Phoenix, Rafiki, or Bage Lord of the Flame Scape, this Baboonian semi-regular enjoys bickering with the other regulars and killing chat flow
Trixitie A favorite of the Ivory Tower, this legendary high-scoring gamer chick usually likes to stop by after hours for chats with Jake, Thor, Kool, and other long-time regulars. And to paraphrase Opiatejake, She's probably hot, because she says she doesn't think she is.
XSoulHeadshotX The Welshy of the room, she has a profound knowledge of space and most things that connect to that. Also a very successful troll.
Vallintino This guy is everywhere
Mostly Inactive Edit
Angelic_Guide Always up for reasoned discussion. Don't understand why people trashed his description here, he's a cool dude. (Angelic_Guide: I left the room after someone decided to do everything in his/her power to make my time there miserable. I still pop in on occasion, but these times are few and far in between. I also have a new account, and am on that one for most of the time. If you wish to talk to me, send me a message.)
ClydeVaulter Going by CV or Clyde, this guy often remains idle in the chat, but pops in now and then to voice his opinion, or just to laugh. Generally accepting of most people, save for trolls, spammers, and the such. Also talks Engrish with Soul a lot.
ghostracoon14 Still no description....
MatchesOnFire Matches is not the kind that simply insults someone, first he gets facts, decides if they are trollish in his mind, then basically tells them to go away if they are! He's a troll stomper in his own, and someone I personally love talking to! He's a damn cool guy and I'm glad we became friends after we first met (we had an argument and yeah)...
NinjaDuckie Resident homosexual and not afraid to defend his honour (note the British 'u' in honour). Gets regularly mistaken for a girl by n00bish troll-types, a couple of whom got to the point of asking him out before realising. He's a Boxian now. [Yes, I am.. more or less. Every time I've come back to IT the place has been totally quiet. Did you all mute me or something? I've got Steam redownloading L4D, and I miss the old days. Might nip back to IT for a month or so.]
Slydragon A cool guy who has been in Ivory since October of 2008, Sly isn't in Ivory much but if he does happen to be there and talking you should definitely meet him.
TheUzi Is pissed off for having been a productive member of this society and still not having been put on the wiki that no one reads. And he nicknamed some people Props for that.
Dyrak Cool kid, the name 'Dyrak' reminds me of a dragon. xD Mutes a lot of people, sometimes for fun.
User Comments Edit
Mr.Uzi says: I should probably be on the mildly active not the unactive.. oh and duckie thinks i have amnesia
Suchihaz says: 'Ivory Tower is the BEST chat room on Kongregate... Well actually, its the best chat room I've ever been in anywhere on the net!'
Opiatejake says: 'Ivory Tower rules for one reason. That one reason is: we respect the n00b. If you are talking to any of us regs we'll help you out and talk to you, unless you are a total retard, period.' Haha, Jake, you make me laugh XD
going2killu says: 'hey n00bs, go suck one!!! XD'
Omgitzsky says: 'Hi...'
♠TheUzi♠ says: What the hell?! I'm still not on the wiki?!
Mf0ty says: 'I see stupid people' Haha... You MF!
Meatshield says: 'lol my quotes refer to whores and sexual acts so you might just want to leave me out of that'
holydemon32 says: "I look away from the screen for 2 seconds.. And I see Waldo porn.."
MatchesOnFire says: " What the hell do you mean there are no more cheezy poofs?! That's ridiculous! Oh, and yeah, Ivory Tower rocks your balls, now excuse me while i go find more cheezy poofs.."
ajfriss says: It's boring around here lately. There are the new people, sometimes good ones. And then there are the idiots... Like Jake... Oh shit its already recording? Oh god.
evilpankake says: "IVORY TOWER IS FOR TEH LOLZ :) but we also have intellectual conversations which consist of LOLZ :D but seriously Ivory Tower is great, join us if you have kong, you know you want to join the dark side :|"
User Comments on Other Users Edit
SuchihaZ says about Matches: "Matches and Myself started off with a religion related fight, and I'm glad it turned around the very next day! A troll came in and started bothering some regs, myself, and matches. Eventually everyone went troll stomp mode and we got him to stfu. Thats when me and Matches set aside our differences and became friends. Now we talk about this years best movie, Transformers 2!!! lol! Thanks for bein there all this time, Matches!"
Omgitzsky says about Omgitzsky: "Sky is prolly the ruler of Ivory Tower. Not really but shes cool. She likes donuts, too."
XSoulHeadshotX says about Morgan133: "He's almost always on, he's funny and active. He's definetly someone to meet."
Why Join Ivory Tower? Edit
The regulars and the non-regulars (aside from the occasional trolls) are very nice. We make lots of jokes; entertainment is a goal in the Ivory Tower! We make sure to get rid of trolls before muting them, so this way they don't harass more people. Besides, the atmosphere, the moderators, and the regulars are just plain EPIC! xD
Instead of asking yourself why you should join the Ivory Tower, ask why you should not... For this is the true question, a question that needs no answer, but simply to be left alone as only a question. No rebuttal or rebuke required, just a solemn agreement to willingly plunge into the unknown until you find yourself in front of the massive tower built of ivory...
The Ballad of Ivory Tower Edit
There's a place deep down in the chat room dungeon where very few dare to go
It's a wild place, and a dangerous place, and a place that's very low
But it's the best damn place in the whole damn place and that's all you need to know
It's a jungle in there, and a crazy old place, but a hell of a ride to go
The Ivory Tower is the place to be if you want to hunt down some trolls
Because they're big and dumb and always easy if you're interested in some lolz
Just try to be stupid and try to act dumb and the regs will put you in your place
And if you keep on trying it'll just end badly, Jake will sit on your face
Rogerette and Crysanna are the room's two mods, ready to silence and ban
But the rest of us are always around and always ready to lend a hand
There's AJ whose mind is a little on the wacky
But it doesn't really matter unless you're acting tacky
And Epic comes in with a really big mouth
He may be kind of inbred (we think he's from the south)
Suchi's going to get you because he's out for blood
So all you little trolls go back into the mud
Then there's Matches who'll tell you that you suck
Stay around too long and he'll really mess you up
Mint's just as sharp as her name may suggest
Try to mess with her, she'll prove she's best
MF might just be the most twisted of the bunch
Don't talk to him while you're eating your lunch
And if music is the best, if lyrics are your game
Just talk to Thor, but he will still bring the pain
And if you want to leave feeling just an inch high
Just troll with Trek and she'll comply
Then there's the guy whose name says he's no tool
Try to screw with him, he's the guy called Kool
And when it's time for troll hunting season
G2K will eff you up, just give him a reason
So, like I said before, there's a place deep down in chat room hell
When I tell you the name it's going to ring a bell
It's a place of legend and a place of myth, and the darkest dreams of night
So if you have a problem take it somewhere else because we're ready for a fight
And it's a fight you'll lose because we have the best damn crew the chat world has ever seen
Because we're rough and tough and we're smart and cool and damn are we ever mean
So you may think you're smart and may be ten years old with mad trolling power
But don't screw with us my little friend, we'll bury you beneath Ivory Tower.